i dont know wat to do....

theres something wrong with me today...i have nothing to do today...so...after watching movie with kim,bryan and kelvin....kung fu dunk...i started thinking seriously bout my future...the once cheerful me and the ''i dont care'' attitude of mine...is like stopped for a moment to reflect what i've done and what i've worked out for my future...especially now is the moment to think of that..cuz this is the year of facing the spm....and i mean ''the''spm......

well...1st thing to reflect of will be my studies...although i have this concept of''studying ''days''before exams''will like make u memorize everything more and better....but from my friends advice or like how the way my frens study...take example like kim....well...her mother always reminds her to study...where else my mom dont..well i think that it wont help me at all....the lazy bone of mine needs to be nagged and then to be reminded...but no one is helping me at all...and i dont know if i can actually help myself...God..pls help me....

everyone is asking me what do u want to be when u grow up...or what field will u choose when u enter uni or college..well...honestly..i chosen 3 fields which can suits me....communications...english..and graphic designing...well honestly....after thinking over and over again...willl these fields secure a good future for me??i dont really know...i just need Gods guidance to walk with me..while i study hard for a better future....

well...nows the ''love'' life...as i come across this kind of age...[17 above...]everyone will ask me..''eh..got gf a??got gf a??''...while i see mostly all my friends started to have gf...i juz cant stop thinking for myself...as i look unto the mirror....will i suit any girl???talking bt these...reminds me of ''her'' which i cannot tell out...but as far as i know....i dont really know if my feelings towards ''her'' will last...as far as i can tell...chances of me with her is very slim...cuz ''she'' is better than me in many ways...not like me.....i am juz a tiny rat....i am scared...lost in this cruel world filled with disorder and violence....i always prayed....God...pls help me in all these things...it have been really suffering...reach your hands to me.....

thats all....